Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
