i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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