I've blown a few things in my day
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
