I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize