Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
