smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize