Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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