Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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