Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize