I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Michael Bay diarrhea
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
