Well douche your snatch and let's go!
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
