Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Randomize
