needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize