i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize