I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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