Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
