bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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