Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
