You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize