ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
