I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
