Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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