We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
