It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
