i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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