the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
