Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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