What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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