my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
