so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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