She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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