I never want to see another naked old woman again.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
The air was thick with penises
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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