And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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