I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
