D3 body, D1 cock
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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