My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
