You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
50% drunk capacity currently
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
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