It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
