I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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