Please don't use social media to get back at me.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
