can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
