What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
im holly from the hills drunk
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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