my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize