dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
