I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
