So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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