And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I am full of burrito and curiosity
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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