drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Randomize
