Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
