The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
