I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize
