it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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